Friday, January 20, 2006

THE CASE OF THE MISSING CONDOMS

Sort of sounds like the title of an updated Nancy Drew mystery, doesn't it? Last night after hubby and I had to take The Girl on a 15-minute sleep-inducing car ride, we decided to play footsie and watch some TiVo-ed shows. And you know how hot you can get watching Lost! So hubby treks into the bathroom in search of a condom. I hear him thrashing about in the drawers. I was rolling my eyes because he has a propensity to misplace things when there is something on top of it (Q: Where are my keys? A: Under the one piece of mail on the dining room table.). So I let him dig for a while. When he came out and told me we had been burgled, I dismissed it and bravely charged into the bathroom to save the romance. But after my five-minute fruitless search, I was baffled. WTF? I just bought a brand new box at Target (Trojan Ultra Ribbed for Her Pleasure)!!! The Girl even opened the box in the store and asked what they were (Medicine for mommies & daddies, now put them back in the cart!).
I know they were still in the box when I came home and remember putting the empty box in the bathroom trash can. And I thought I put the condoms in the usual drawer. We searched a little more because we were both stunned that condoms could just disappear. Clearly, there would be no romance for us since a baby conceived now would be born mid-October (our motto: no Fall or Holiday babies).
But the mystery remains... where did the condoms go? Did we misplace them? Possibly. Did the babysitter take them? Possibly. Am I going to Target to replace them? Hells ya.
And I will be conducting a thorough search today and will report my findings here later. It will be just like CSI Ventura.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I would check to see if The girl used them to put Rain hats on her dollies

V said...

Im gonna stand up for the babysitter (since Im pretty sure I know who they are) ... we both know neither one would take ALL of them!

That is quite the mystery. Whats more of a mystery is why you only have one box of condoms!

Sugarmama said...

I'm with anonymous--they may be being employed as "medicine" for dolls and animals at the moment, and I can't wait to hear how.

By the way, you may already know this but apparently boxes of tampons are also fascianting items for little girls to play with.

VenturaMom from said...

Dudes! The Girl cannot reach the drawer they were in. They are not in the drawer or the cupboard or anywhere else in the bathroom or the bedroom or The Girl's room or on the heads of her dolls.

Anonymous said...

Two words: Horny ghosts. Totally.

VenturaMom from said...

Bwahahahahah.