HOW STARBUCKS RUINED AN ALREADY BAD DATE NIGHT

After the aforementioned b-day festivities (WITH LEMURS!!!) Saturday, we left The Girl with the grandparents so we could go on a date. We were going to go to dinner but we were still full from the eleventy-hundred carne asada street tacos we ate at the party (BTW it was catered and we did not just roll up on a street taco vendor and chow down). So instead of dinner we decided to see the Johnny Cash movie. It started at 7:10 and that was too late because we are old and tired and need to be home by nine at the latest. And it was only 5:30ish at the time, so we decided to go shopping. For what? I don't know. We headed to Mervyn's (a HOT date night location, no?) but were thwarted by a roadblock for the Santa Maria parade of lights (read: big trucks with rope lights creating holiday icons like trees and stars and baby Jesus). So we headed to everyone's favorite date night destinations TJ Max and Target. We looked at Christmas stockings. Gregg is waaaaaay too picky and we didn't find any up to his exacting standards.

I know what you are thinking, if indeed you have waded this far into this horrible date night recap. You are thinking this is the worst date ever. BUT NO!!! It gets worse.

We left Target and headed to a late dinner at Casa Manana (G's fav Mexican restaurant in his boyhood 'hood). Got there before 7. There was a wait and a large sign saying they don't take credit or debit cards (WTF?). Off to the bank. Side trip to look up any head shops in the phone book. Those pages had been torn out of the phone book, of course. Back to Casa where the wait is now at least 45 minutes. Decide we don't need dinner. We'll just go get hot cocoa and a chai and hold hands at Starbucks. "FINALLY," you say, "we are getting to the damn Starbucks story."

So we go to the 'bucks and stand in line (5 deep, not too bad). Before we place our order, the employee says, "It will 15-20 minutes for your drinks. Is that OK?" Um....uh....um...NO! Leave without a vente 7-pump chai, no h2o, no foam. Yes, folks. You read that right. At 7:55 p.m. in Santa Maria on Saturday night when there had been a well-publicized night-time holiday parade, Starbucks had TWO employees working and a bajillion customers waiting for their drinks. IDIOTS!!!!!!

But wait, there's more... We head to another Starbucks several miles away from the parade route. It's in an Albertson's grocery store. We arrive at 8:02 p.m. They closed at 8.

And that, folks, ends the sad story of our very bad date night. Amen.